12 tips to make your bedtime routine nervous system friendly
audio: 25 minutes | read time: 8 minutes
disclaimer: This is not medical advice. This is intended to educate, inspire and support you in your self healing journey. Speak to your medical professional. Some content might be sensitive; I invite you to practice self-harmonizing.
Bad sleep is a pretty bad stressor to your nervous system.
When you don’t sleep well, your body doesn’t rest or repair itself and everything is negatively impacted; brain, gut, hormones, mood, ability to detox… everything!
What constitutes bad sleep? Well its pretty subjective;
did you sleep 7-9 hours through the night?
are you waking up rested, energized and excited for the day? or are you tired and unmotivated?
do you rely on coffee for energy?
are you tired during the day?
If you feel like your sleep could use a little support, here are 12 tips to make your bedtime routine nervous system friendly:
*note: some people might add “reduce stress” as a tip here, but I see stress as too large and encompassing; all of these 12 tips reduce, and more importantly, help heal stress.
1. mindset shift to prioritize and receive rest
Sleep isn’t something to “do when you’re dead” sleep is a basic survival need, meaning its essential to nervous system health & harmony because the nervous system is all about safety & survival.
Prioritizing rest and allow yourself to receive rest is a mindset shift foundational to these other practices.
You get to make the call. Is sleep and rest a priority? Would you prefer to keep the neverending pressure of producing more and more and more?
If you feel guilty about resting, perhaps it’s time to dig a little deeper as to why.
2. start small
I’m about to offer a lot; because you are very different from the other people reading this.
Pick one or two of these tips that resonate with you to start with and then try them on in your own life for a couple weeks!
No need to overwhelm yourself trying to take it all on at once, am I right? I see you, you perfectionist, I see you.
3. stay consistent
For any meaningful changes to occur in the nervous system, it’s got to be consistent because repetition is required for neuroplasticity; i.e. lasting changes in the brain and nervous system.
This means a few things:
build a routine to do nightly, the same routine
consistent bed time; if you bounce around going to bed at 10pm or 1am your nervous system will be confused, and make it hard to go to bed at a good time.
do your nervous system friendly bedtime routine every night for many nights before you start making any judgments around if it’s working or not
make time during your day to do conscious rest practices like legs up the wall Why? If you’re always ON, it’s going to be hard to turn OFF at night.
This consistency is predictable which sends signals safety to the nervous system.
4. limit evening light
Evolutionarily speaking, we evolved to rise and rest with the sun. Artificial lights signal to the nervous system to stay stimulated and awake; aka wired and tired 😴
How I adjust my lights to support sleep;
bright daytime lights become dim at night
white/blue daytime lights become warm/red/orange at night
overhead daytime lights become low lights (floor lamp, desk/table lamp, candle light) at night
limit devices entirely for 1-2 hours before bed, devices on airplane mode
5. include a scent
The sense of smell, coming from your olfactory nerve, is the first cranial nerve. Yes, nature decided smell would be the first sense to develop (before sights, touch, etc.)
By including a specific scent to use during your bedtime routine, you are signaling a very powerful sense, reminding your nervous system that it’s time to calm down and prepare for rest.
I like using organic lavender essential oil on the soles of my feet and wrists. I also like this vagus nerve oil.
6. habit stack
One of the best ways to actually do the new tip to help your habit of building a nervous system friendly bedtime routine is to stack the tip next to a current habit.
For example — You brush/floss your teeth every night; you could put your phone in the other room on airplane mode before you start your routine.
Or — You clean the kitchen every night; you could turn off the overhead lights and turn on under cabinet lights (bonus if you switch that light out to red).
You see what I’m doing here.
7. right bedroom environment
You’ve probably heard of sleep hygiene.
A big pillar of sleep hygiene is the room should be cool, dark and quiet.
Let’s so back to the concept of us rising and resting with the sun; during the day its warmer, brighter and more active. At night the opposite it true; it’s cooler, dark, and quiet.
cool — 5+ degrees F colder at night than day
dark — pitch black
quiet — minimize unnecessary noise, if you can’t a steady calming noise might be helpful
8. circadian rhythm
Sleep isn’t a night time issue, it’s a day time issue. Preparing for restful sleep begins with when and how you wake up.
The circadian rhythm is a series of physical, mental, and behavioral changes that follow a 24-hour cycle.
A healthy circadian rhythm starts upon waking up. And the circadian rhythm is ruled by light (central clock) and food (peripheral clock).
To help your circadian rhythm:
watch the sunrise or get sunlight in your eyes for 5-20 minutes within an hour of waking up
get 5-20 minutes of midday sun
watch the sunset
dim lights after dusk, no blue light
eat meals at consistent times each day
eat 2-4ish hours before bed
9. exercise early in the day
Exercise is essential to your nervous system health and sleep. But exercising at night can cause some issues.
Exercising elevates stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. In the context of exercise, this is great! (Exercise is good stress, called eustress).
However elevating cortisol and adrenaline at night… not so great for sleep and restoring your bodymind.
10. notice your speed
How quickly do you eat dinner? Wash the dishes? Brush your teeth?
Are you jumping from one task to another?
If you’re moving super quickly, likely the mobilizing sympathetic nervous system is activated here, which would make sleeping more challenging.
11. let go of control
If you are doing all the thing and still have trouble sleeping…
If you are getting sunlight in your eyes first thing in the morning, dimming evening lights, limiting screen times before bed, if you have a consistent bedtime routine, if you’re exercising early, if you’re eating bigger meals earlier… you might want to explore letting go of control.
Sleep is a vulnerable state. You are unconscious. Things that you suppress during the day, can come up at night when you start to let your guard down to rest.
12. remember that there’s space for all of it
The nights you don’t follow your routine; the nights you want to stay up to finish a project, or that you go out dancing and have two drinks, or that you are your partner binge a show… let those be stress healing medicine, too.
If you never allow yourself to have the other (late nights) then the times you do it is isn’t by choice. Choice is a big part of healing.
The opposite of choice is force. Which energy (choice or force) feels good, elevated and whole?
Which of these could use a little more of your attention and energy? Share with me in the comments and join the community on Instagram @the.stress.healer
infinite love,
Stephanie
