8 tips for handling stresses of everyday life with more ease
audio 20 minutes | read time: 8 minutes
disclaimer: This is not medical advice. This is intended to educate, inspire and support you in your self healing journey. Speak to your medical professional. Some content might be sensitive; I invite you to practice self-harmonizing.
You get home from your last errand of the day just in time for a super speedy lunch before work.
Life has become even faster, with more demands than ever.
Feeling like the one woman show, taking care of others and yourself, the stresses of daily life never end.
Here are 8 tips of handling stresses of everyday life:
1 — allow space for your emotions
Feeling overwhelmed? I hear you. Feeling angry? That’s okay. Feeling exhausted? I get it. It’s all allowed. It’s all welcome here.
The human experience isn’t about feeling good all the time but getting good at feeling the full range of what it’s like to be human.
Emotions aren’t “good” or “bad”, where some need to be hidden or cast aside while others celebrated.
Emotions are energy in motion, messages that give us vital information for how we feel about something.
— in practice: when you feel stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, panicked, etc. name it. I’m feeling (fill in the blank). When you name it notice where you feel it in your body. Notice the quality of what you feel. And then allow it to exist, accept it because it’s here now guiding you.
2 — learn to pause
There is an old zen proverb that says, “meditate 20 minutes per day, unless you’re busy, mediate an hour”
You’ve become so busy being busy. Living in frantic fight/flight energy it’s no wonder you’re stressed and fly off the railings when the faucet breaks — your experiences will match your energy.
If you don’t learn to pause to check in with yourself, you’ll continue to operate at lightening speed, numbing your body, ignoring your emotions, suppressing your needs… and it’s all just downhill from there.
in practice: set regular appointments to have somatic check-ins. This could be with a somatic coach, your morning sadhana (spiritual practice), orient with your matcha instead of chugging it, bio-breaks sprinkled throughout the day… ideally its a combination of it all.
3 — move more
The fight or flight energy (sympathetic nervous system) is a mobilizing energy! So get in motion! Give the sympathetic energy a place to go!
in practice: daily gentle walks, yoga like gentle vinyasa, tennis, kickboxing, swimming, rock climbing, good ol’ fashioned play!
4 — ask for help
Humans are social beings!
Polyvagal Theory demonstrates that the first line of defense when stressed is Social Engagement… your community is protection from stressors!
I get it, there is a negative stigma against asking for help. But why?! Does it make you look dumb or weak? Would you think less of your friend, co-worker or partner if they asked you for help?
in practice: how can you ask for help? can you delegate a work task to a co-worker? can you ask your partner to do the grocery shopping even though you always pick the better produce? can you hire someone to paint instead of DIY?
5 — do less
There’s a handful of tasks on your plate that don’t belong there… admit it!
You’ve taken on too much, needing to prove yourself and your worth, overpromised and afraid of underdelivering.
Been there, you perfectionist, you.
in practice: say no to something today.
6 — take one activity outside
Nature reminds us to slow down and appreciate life. The frequency of the Earth is a powerfully grounding and calming force — which is why I am outside 2-4+ hours every day, most of that time barefoot!
in practice: what’s one thing you could do outside? could you eat one of your meals outside? take a meeting or phone call outside? walk outside instead of using a treadmill? read, journal or drink your morning coffee outside?
7 — remember it’s by choice
My greatest wish for you is you remember you are an infinitely creative and capable being, and that you are free to live the life you desire and deserve.
That means remembering you always have choice, even when it feels like obligation.
Through all of the stress healing, nervous system harmonizing, somatic practice… the goal isn’t money or achievement…the goal is freedom.
Freedom to live the life you want, freedom to be happy, fulfilled, content moment by moment.
Freedom is the intention to hold as you move through stress healing.
Freedom to feel what you feel, to be as you are… and freedom to explore changes and a new way of being.
in practice: what’s one thing you often feel obligated to do and kind of hate doing. make dinner? laundry? work? let’s stick with the dinner example… you aren’t forced to cook dinner, you can go out or order take out, you could pour a bowl of cereal. cooking dinner is not an obligation. if you cook it’s because you want to use what you have in the fridge (you already bought), or you want to eat healthy and avoid seed oils.
8 — practice gratitude
Gratitude was a big practice for me for years in my mid-20’s.
Every morning I wrote down a list of things I was grateful for. Some days it was easy to think of things I was grateful for and the list was long. Some days it felt near impossible.
It’s called a practice for a reason, you do it daily even when you don’t want to, and your brain begins to rewire itself to feel grateful for the big and little things in life, and all the moments in between.
in practice: write down or say out loud things you’re grateful for. if you’re grateful for your matcha, are you then also grateful for the water, the tea pot, and the honey you added? can you also allow yourself to feel into the gratitude for the company, farmers, drivers, store workers, etc. who brought the matcha to you?
My friend Noelle once shared with me, we often spiral down into negative feelings, but we can spiral up (with gratitude), too.
Which of these tips resonates most with you?
infinite love,
Stephanie
